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In the morning, at noon, at night ... at first, it seems as if the hours of the day are out of place - the order begins to change as we adapt to each other.
Agenda for the baby familyAnikou raised Zsolti from birth, reading that "with a well-kept baby" was all life. Zsolti's cow eats a little, she just drinks tea at night and "plays" in the boat during the day. The timetable must not be overwhelmed either by a fringe or a major outing. You have to feed home when it breaks, when it breaks. Anikou is terrified not to ruin it somewhere, and will be cured if the little one interferes in our housework. At first, Zsolti changed her head to purple at night and day when she was hungry or went for a little nurse. Today, they are less and less demanding. He doesn't expect help, he knows he'll get it. And breastfeeding is long overdue.Karmen is a believer in free education. For me, the "agenda" is equal to the tyranny of the Sly. The marshmallow Jasmine sleeps, eats when she wants to, or when she turns "like this." If the parents are up for a long time, the little one gets pregnant at noon, and sometimes - when they have to - they get pregnant at eight. There are some meals, but the snack lasts all day. There is no difference between the weekends and the weekends, because they work from home. As Karmen becomes more exhausted, the child does not seem too happy.
Do we need to find the middle ground and set up a third set of rules to live our lives? This does not appear to be possible either. Inkбbb let's get to know the kid, and also come to our own expectations, our indices.
Requirements are negotiable
- You believe that on-demand breastfeeding itself will result in coke, and because of that, children "spoil", and many families fall. On-demand breastfeeding is not about complete confusion, but about serving the baby's needs, which is important for the baby's development and health, as it ensures proper milk production.
Although the first few months are very difficult, you do not have to think that there will always be such a confusion in the family life. The baby has its own schedule, and it would be best to get to know it and adapt to it. This is not easy because the baby's rhythm is very different from that of adults.
It helps a lot to think that adults don't eat the same amount every day, at the same times. The manager also does not hurt if he has to starve an end, not at an open meeting, but let the outside press. Then, when you get home, of course, you are able to sip a generous amount of wheat on the spot. Fortunately, the baby does not work as well.
- How do you get through the initial difficult weeks?
- It's best to consider this period as temporary. Certain life stages are serious adaptability and flexibility they require their relatives. When it comes to caring for a sick or elderly relative, it is only natural that we have access to impossible times, even for months and years. It is such an extraordinary period of life in infancy, which will surely be lost in a few months.
- What should we do if the rest of the family is struggling to handle this situation?
- As the months go by, we can steer the baby to adjust to the family's agenda. When it comes to family or relationship-related breastfeeding, it always turns out that there is another problem between family members. On-demand breastfeeding does not mean that, apart from the first few months, we completely give up control, allow everything to the child, do not set limits, and do not keep our family in a safe place.
The Order of Szli - the Order of the Child
Molnбr Judit psychologists are rarely approached by parents who find it difficult to detect this change.
- The majority of women today are two-and-a-half. The little one should divide her time just as if nothing had changed with her parenting, she had to do housework, but she also had to stay "in the middle". It looks like everything has changed, because society expects it to be a child. Even so, he has no idea how he should "control" the situation.
So far, the kindergarten, the school, the parents and the workplace have done it instead. Freedom falls and you bury yourself. Yet, the baby's years could be lived in some form of freedom. For example, a mom who calls breastfeeding around eight o'clock for dinner and has a recurring evening ritual. She puts on a little "pajamas", activates the room, makes silent music for breastfeeding, closes the baby's day.
He thinks his own time is coming now. If necessary, she will breastfeed two hours later, but this is considered by the baby to be the "night of the night," which will be a minor part of life only.
- Looks like we've got handrails in our lives.
- Really, that is the essence of internal order. When I advise a fully "diseased" adult patient to open the kitchen window at three o'clock every day, I have helped him a lot, even though this window opening makes no sense whatsoever. The will concentration is increased has an effect that can help you find order.
It is not necessary to have a hard agenda, but few things stand out from the sun. Let's say the cooks. These can also be used to meet your child's needs, but you really need to get to know the little one. The baby and comatose played a very important role in this. The mother and the child had nothing else but to get to know each other. It would be six weeks for them to they formed a mutual rhythm between the two. They will then be more easily adapted to each other and to other members of the family.
- The rhythm is not equal to the agenda.
- No, but observing and respecting the rhythm can lay the foundation for the family to develop a relative agenda. Of course, we can't talk about an agenda that fits every family. If Dad works long hours and can only meet the little ones in the evening, why can't they all cook for ten? However, the fire blanket should be regular, and in the morning parents should have the opportunity to sleep for the little ones, and create a good time for themselves!
A complete lack of rhythm causes internal uncertainty and chaos. We know that at an early age, the baby has a certain daily rhythm, which adapts to the mother. Why do we think it will disappear after birth?
You just have to be in close proximity, pay attention to it. Many people think that it is not good for babies to expect a tiny bit of adaptation from the baby. Somehow they don't trust the baby to be able to. Then, when the third, fourth child is born, they wonder how good the little one is at adapting. "Even though we have a beautiful ability, the order ...", some time will pass - but it will.
Dictatorship and education
A similar ambition was also observed in socialist Hungary. A closed agenda was needed in the mid-'60s, because women started to work shortly after childbirth, and a couple of months later had a place to say goodbye. Life was easier if the baby did not have to be accustomed to the moral order.
We can enjoy the fruits of this today! We often hear that babies need to sleep at least three nights before feeding, and it is very important that they always eat at the same time, bathing. Therefore, many people assume that infantile diarrhea is intended to dominate the adult population.
Let's watch our baby
Then, in the middle of the French bed, there was a mousetrap. I ran a booklet for my little baby about all the great deeds: suckling, boy, cock, sleeping, sleeping. One month later, we were both on the verge of exhaustion: on the other hand, she was breastfeeding, having a lot of lazy baths, short sleeps, of course, we were just on the big bed.
Finally, we called a two-person choice one last night and found that we were under-monitored. His eyes widened.
Now, somehow, I was not annoyed enough to sleep next to my son instead of my son - two months later we were "familiar" with ourselves. Nocturnal breastfeeding has also become much simpler, so I almost got tired of myself. We did not force the bath this week. In the kitchen, we made dinner in the morning when we were still asleep or at bedtime when we could. We found the rhythm!
Three years later, with Bob, I was very much in my tummy. We organized our grandmothers, friends, neighbors to always have someone on hand when the little one was.
Soon we were standing next to the bunny and we were expecting our sleeping bag to wake up. We looked forward to it. He opened his eyes finally and squatted a little that he was hungry. I breastfeeded, and after ten minutes, he was asleep. Even when the henchmen were hitting the neighborhood. He ate, slept, smiled, smelt.
She is very calm after all, always cool baby boy. He smiles up at the top of the shelf smiling, handsomely enters the little cars in the room of the houseplants, drinks the dog's water while his bastard swims in the yard, making a loud noise in the yard.
They adapt to each other
- Not everyone is fortunate enough to have a child who is perfectly fit for their "parenting principles" at first birth. Ferkу (12 years) is like that. Immediately she slept the night, she was a peaceful, peaceful baby, rarely but suckling a lot. From the beginning, we have been accustomed to lying down, getting up early, because we are night owls. At eleven o'clock in the evening, it was a good bath, sleeping until eight in the morning, so we could rest.
Andris (9 years old) was harder to figure out because he was basically excited. The evening was fine, but she didn't sleep much in the morning. Бtvйszeltьk.
The agenda has always had its foundations - we wake up at eight, a lunch around the clock - and of course, they spent the time that was right. We changed the system with one of the children because he was still asleep at the age of one and he was sleeping and sleeping. When she was little, we all had a little lunch.
As they were able to sit, we were accustomed to the family table. If requested, he received a few snacks from our lives, next to baby clothes and breast milk. Even the smallest joined the big ones almost imperceptibly, so we could organize the day among the public caterers.
The three little ones (Kata six and a half, Balzzs' half, Cili's two and a half years) had to adapt to the institutions. Breastfeeding or sleep often shifted to meet their individual needs, because they really need to get to school on time. However, they do not look like difficult, emotionally distressed children, all suckling to toddlers…
The hardest thing for Cilin to do is stick to an age-appropriate agenda. As the big ones get better in the evening, they don't even have to sleep. The rescue angel is the grandmother who moved into the neighborhood. Cili can sleep, even though I have this baby in the morning, I get some money. Grandma's eyes are on, of course, so I know the little Sleeping Beauty in the morning owl.
Initially, we find that our little ones just eat and sleep - or sometimes howl - all at the most varied times. You start something, you bite into a loaf of bread, and then put it down very easily…
The only thing that matters is that the time passes and that the child is a woman. And, as a woman, she does not fall asleep in the most unexpected situations, does not starve her, she can catch her attention with games and sayings. Slowly, they also learn to (slightly) learn and adapt. In my experience, the situation begins to improve when you only need one bedtime and one sleepout. You can have the day right up there. The changeover occurred at about six to eight months in our country. Meanwhile, when I had only one long sleeping sleep, I felt the Canaan come. It was possible to design programs in the early hours, and there were two free lounges in Duluth!
All the way until my next child is born. My Domi son was two-time. I had to put a newborn incalculable into their evolved agenda. In the meantime, he also had to think about his big needs in the fire. Domi mostly wanted to play - with me - the little sucker, and I wanted to put on a three-day-old laundry in the washing machine.
This is when we need to develop "motherhood", which is a combination of subjects such as flexibility, organizational skills, reconciling different needs, and transcribing our own needs - transiently.
Then the first year passes. Marci has only slept once a day lately. Occasionally, sometimes, just when the bigger one ... So slowly the Canaan repeats here!
What can disturb the already established rhythm?
- Development itself: Another need for sleep and nutrition for a newborn and a half-baby.
- The emergence of a variety of delights: As the baby becomes more intelligent, it becomes more and more eager to discover the world.
- Natural Changes in Mother-Child Relationships: From the age of eight months and beyond, the little one especially requires the presence of his mother, the fear of being alone or of strangers.
- Sickness, vaccination, hospital care, travel, relocation, brother's birth.
- Breastfeeding difficulties (low milk, newer pregnancy, growth jump).
- If you want to change for a short period of time violently (feed for a while, let it shine at night).
LefektetйsAfter the irregular wakes and suckings of the first few months, we can observe how much time our baby is blurring. In the early afternoon, in the early afternoon, you can usually spend a bit of time bathing, playing games, walking, shopping. Do not overdo the babybecause it will make it even harder to settle.
After the ubiquitous phase, gradually release the tension that has accumulated towards the end of the day. At night, you can swap rug for a night. Carefully stroke the limbs with a slow motion, perhaps with a drop of lavender oil. Turn off the lamp in your room, just leave a little night light on. Wrap it in your blanket, take it in our arms, and open the window for a few minutes. Let's sing, sing a little, and put it in bed.
Put a soft doll, animal or cloth in your hands. Develop habits that do not pose a burden in the long run. It is better to sing beside your baby in a comfortable armchair, to read while your baby is falling asleep, rather than to walk with him or her. If you are breastfeeding, we can safely let you fall asleep in the middle, and gradually get into other rituals.